Twin Peaks – The Return: Watch and Listen Laura is the one

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via Showtime

Calm Down, Candie

Candie is still sobbing despite Rodney insisting that he is fine. In the background, the television is on. Rodney and Bradley are watching the news when they see footage of Ike the Spike getting hauled away by the police.

They decide that now would be a good time to put a hit out on Ike. When Dougie/Coop comes on the screen, the brothers immediately recognize him as Mr. Jackpots.

Janey-E Gives Two Rides

The first thing we see are Janey-E’s red shoes. A subtle nod to Audrey perhaps? She is sitting in a chair watching Dougie/Coop as he is enthusiastically eating a piece of chocolate cake.

Fidgeting in her chair and acting like a schoolgirl in heat, she asks him if he finds her attractive. He stops chewing his cake and just looks at her with a blank expression. Then he returns to eating his cake. For some reason, this is highly amusing.

Janey-E continues to try and flirt with him. The next thing we know, she is astride Dougie/Coop in the bedroom riding him like Secretariat. Underneath her, Dougie/Coop’s arms are flailing. When she climaxes loudly by shouting his name and waking up Sonny Jim, the camera moves in for a close up of Dougie/Coop’s face as he grins rather stupidly.

Grab the Golden Shovel

Dr. Jacoby (Russ Tamblyn) is at it again. This time he is screaming about wool in his podcast. Nadine is enthusiastically listening to him in her shop, Run Silent, Run Drapes.

After tackling the tough controversial subject of wool, Jacoby moves on to how the pharmaceutical companies own everything including mortuaries. Then he encourages his listeners to save the children by buying a shovel to dig out of the shit. Brilliant rants.

Hot for Dougie

Janey-E is getting ready to take Dougie/Coop to work and Sonny Jim to school. Before Dougie/Coop can make it to the car, she pins him down. Evidently, she is still feeling randy. She kisses him and he doesn’t respond to her.

In the Woods

Jerry is still in the woods. He screams, “You can’t fool me, I’ve been here before.” Could he be trapped in between dimensions in a portal or is he just tripping on shrooms again?

You’ve Got Mail

Deputy Chad is lingering in the lobby like he is waiting for something. Immediately suspicious, Lucy asks him what he’s doing. He tells her he is just admiring the beautiful day. Lucy tries to engage him in conversation.

The mail truck appears and he is bounding out of the building and down the stairs. Lucy peers out of the window watching his every move. The carrier hands him the stack of letters. Chad goes through the envelopes until he finds Miriam’s.

He looks up to find that the carrier is still watching him. Finally, he waves him off. Chad slips the envelope into his shirt. Lucy hurries back to her desk.

He enters the building and tells her that it is a beautiful day, hands the mail to her and grabs a donut. Even though she didn’t see anything, Lucy’s face still registers suspicion.