A Very Joe Bob Christmas breaks the internet…again


A Very Joe Bob Christmas managed to crash the Shudder servers again. This is just a testament to how popular the Texan movie critic is within the horror community. Breaking the internet is just business as usual for The Last Drive-In.

A Very Joe Bob Christmas proved that a Commodore 64 doesn’t make for a great server for millions of people to stream from. On Dec. 21, we settled into our homes to spend dusk ’til dawn with two of our favorite people: Joe Bob Briggs and Darcy the Mail Girl (aka Diana Prince).

Winter Solstice was spent watching A Very Joe Bob Christmas and so many people tuned in that the internet called it a day. Because audience members were booted from the stream, Shudder made the marathon on demand the very next day. I think we can all call that a success.

We knew beforehand that the marathon would center around a single horror franchise. However, no one knew which one until Joe Bob revealed they would all be Phantasm films. Most fans were expecting Silent Night, Deadly Night. However, while the majority of viewers accepted the show’s decision to focus on the Phantasm franchise, others were hoping for more holiday fare.

The marathon began with a song sung by Joe Bob himself. Afterwards, he waxed nostalgic about opening for Boxcar Willie. He then proceeded to give out the rules to surviving Christmas and not killing your relatives.

We got to watch Phantasm, Phantasm III: Lord of the Dead and Phantasm IV: Oblivion and Phantasm RaVager. He skipped Phantasm II because his favorite ‘Cuda was destroyed in the film and this is his form of protest.

We got to hear A Very Joe Bob Christmas story about pig-faced Wilbur with the speech impediment who lived in a cardboard box and could only count to four. Joe Bob also talked about Charlie Brown and the difference between good will to all men while mentioning Catholics vs Protestants.

We ended the marathon with the 12 Days of Phantasm featuring Reggie Bannister and his quadro-barrel gun (who hung out the entire marathon). Meanwhile, Joe Bob was dressed as Santa, which is a true Christmas carol.

It was a ton of fun to end on. I think we need the 12 Days of Phantasm on vinyl (SOMEONE GET ON THIS!). And lest we forget a silver sphere to the hat.

Image courtesy of Shudder

While this wasn’t as exciting as other marathons because after the initial surprise, we knew all the movies that were coming up, it was just a joy to spend Christmas with our favorite horror host. This only solidifies how much the fans want Joe Bob back and we cannot wait to see him and Darcy on a regular basis. We are set to get a series on Shudder in 2019 and we are counting the days.

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A huge thank you to Shudder for bringing us these marathons like A Very Joe Bob ChristmasThe Last Drive In and Dinners of Death. Also thank you to Diana Prince for interacting with us, taking our words to Joe Bob and wearing the most bitching outfits on TV. And finally, thank you, Joe Bob for not forgetting us and coming back for your fans. We’ll see you in 2019!

Did you catch the marathon? Were you happy with the franchise choice? Let us know in the comments!